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Archive for the ‘Twaddle’ Category

Back at the Blogyard

My Post-Divorce Malaise (PDM) has subsided and I’m refreshed, ready to once again don the mantle of jester-pundit and right (write?) the wrongs of the world with wit and words. To this end, abounding alliterative phrases and fake-names will be used with impunity. (Lest you think I am being completely altruistic, I must disclose that my parents are half-owners of a hyphen farm in Honalo, Hawaii.)

The new blog is named “Junk Drawer Prophet” because that was the only available name that fits my needs.

Let me explain. No, there is too much. Let me sum up.

 
The “junk drawer” theme was settled upon right away. I wanted to write about whatever struck my fancy. A “junk drawer” is an accidental collection of disparate items that are occasionally useful and interesting. Reach in the pile – sometimes you’ll come up with a dead battery, other times the green margarita necklace from Red Lobster (Score!).

 
Problem! “The Junk Drawer” was already in use. Damn! Re-think. How about “Junkyard” and for good measure, use a word-play on my middle name, Profit? “Junkyard Prophet” is an awesome name. Sounds like a Rock Band – which it is. A Rap-Rock band like Faith No More. Damn. Next.

 
I already had the junk drawer and glowing-prophet guy images, so what the hell. Strange combination, yes, but seemingly strange combinations are sometimes very cool – peanut butter and chocolate, Siegfried and Roy (pre Montecore), Liza Minelli and David Gest……::Ahem::.

Anyhow, “Junk Drawer Prophet” it is. Hope you enjoy the ride.

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09/05/08

09/05/08

Corners turned, wheels moving, back on track.

Across the Universe.

There and Back Again.

First Star to the right.

Last Rest Stop for 24 miles.

Course certain. Destination Unknown.

Today feels Significant, but I am not sure why. I think it is one of those things that can only be informed by hindsight.

Check back later, there may be Answers.

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Pie Haiku

Behold the wonders of pie!

Sweet strawberry pie
Crunchy soft, creamy whipped top
sadness is banished

(I was feeling a bit rundown after a long day at work. I went to my mother-in-law’s house to hang for a bit and she offered pie. Not wanting to be rude, I accepted 🙂 It helped. )

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Surprisingly Satisfied

Today I picked up Snicker’s bar for my post lunch snack. It was one of those variant or limited edition Snickers with Almonds. Ok fine. No big deal. Peanuts. Almonds. I like both and it’s covered in chocolaty-nougat goodness, so I am eatin’ it!

However the wrapper ad gave me pause. Big blue letters proclaimed that the candy bar was “Now More Satisfying!”. What the hell? More satisfying than what? Any other regular Snickers bar? Even the ginormus $1.50 size? How do you test for more than normal satisfaction? Are monkeys involved? How damn much satisfaction can you get from a candy bar? How much should you get? What does it say about a man who seeks out Almond Snickers for More Satisfaction?

All of the analytics were frying my brain cells, so I just decided to take a bite and find out.

Good. Damn Good. I ate the whole thing. And at the end of it all, much to may chagrin, I was Satisfied.

Damn. I wish I knew if they used monkeys.

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Great Sucky

Today started out Great.

Then it became Sucky.

Later, the Sucky became my fault.

Next I proved the source of the Sucky was not me.

Now it is not my fault and the day is nearly over.

I am back to Great.

Gordon

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Back for the Fall Season

AAANNDD We’re Back!

More correctly, I am back. After a long hiatus, On The Stick has returned for the fall schedule. Damn near got cancelled but Jayne from “Knitting Today” held out for more money and so OTS snuck in.

So, what can you expect to see in the second season?

— A Randy/Gina story or two. I think I am finally ready to write this down.

— The Bozo Story. Yes. The Bozo the Clown Story. The Clown and I have a history and it is time for a full accounting. That Clown is going down.

— The startling conclusion to the Sith Witch story.

— More Gamer stuff. I didn’t touch on this too much last season but this year I plan on showing my gamer geekiness in it’s full glory. Those with weak stomachs may want to avert their gaze.

— The usual drivel about my life and escapades.

— And of course, more naked marsupials. (I have been assured by legal counsel that it is ok to look, just don’t touch. And be certain to wipe the hard drive.)

That’s the quick run down. Should be a wild ride. I hope you stay tuned.

Gordon

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Coburn, you out there?


Hey Coburn… this is a test to see if you are paying attention.

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